“It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else’s life with perfection.”
― The Bhagavad Gita
…the wake-up call
After I turned 20, I enrolled in an intensive Fitness Leadership course, got healthy and earned my Diploma in Personal Training. I went on to add specialty training such as Spin class, Prenatal & Postnatal Fitness and training with able-challenged populations. Here I was ready to go, educated, passionate and willing: but something wasn’t lining up. I was being turned away from jobs, potential clients closed their doors in my face and repeatedly I was told I had no experience.
It took a few years for me to stumble across the other component of wellness; mental health. I’d walked a long tormented journey with my own mentality to get to this point; so it’s no wonder why it was the last bully for me to face. It was my biggest challenge, to get over my own mind. Encouraged to have faith in the laws of attraction and keeping daily affirmations, I wanted to rewire myself to stay positive.
I didn’t know it at the time, but I was at the beginning of my spiritual journey. The missing piece to my new Wellness Lifestyle. Learning about martial arts and alternative healing, I found myself reading up on Qi Gong and Tai Chi. Questioning the microcosms of chi, prana, and kundalini, and still without any knowledge of how meditation came into it; I felt challenged to get a grip on it all.
It wasn’t until I was 26 going through a significant break down, that I became desperate for spirituality. For my own mental health, I found myself diving off the deep end into any alternative therapy I could benefit from.
The draw for wisdom naturally led me to India, contemplating where I could learn more about meditation. I found a school in Goa that offered courses in Traditional Tridosha Yoga and Ayurveda. It didn’t come without its challenges of course, as I’d never taken a yoga class before and wasn’t sure I could quiet my mind. But I had to show up and at least try. Constantly reminded to relax and let go, after four months, something got through. My practice became second nature as I was letting my fear drop away.
It still took me months after getting back to Canada to find my balance. Continuing to do yoga daily, I also started doing Qi Gong and EMDR to help settle my residual anxiety. Overcome with the feeling I wasn’t ready to be part of the world again yet, I agreed to do a pilgrimage across Spain. Taking it as my opportunity to integrate what my life had taught me the previous year.
The Camino de Santiago is a 780 km walk, from the south of France across to the west of Spain. Facing an internal line of questioning that came out of the background, every step became a test of faith. When the walk was finished, and I looked back on the roller coaster of my life; all I could feel was gratitude. I acknowledged the road I’d been on, and turned to face the fact it was still unfolding.
Thankful to those who guided me through it, I learned that regardless of where I was, showing up was all I could do for myself. That growing beyond pain came from having the strength to be vulnerable, to fall apart and then, to laugh… and start again.
Feeding Your Demons
780 km ‘Camino de Santiago’ Pilgrimage
Seven Lotus Qi Gong
RYT 500 Traditional Tridosha Yoga
Indoor Cycle Instructor
Prenatal / Postnatal Fitness Specialist
Posture / Flexibility Assessment & Sport Nutrition
Personal, Group, Special Pop. & Advanced Weight Training